15 April 1995
There's this kid named Nick, Nick McDonald, that I have been getting pretty close with lately. I met him because he is in the same group of friends that I've started to hang out with. He's really cool, and treats me nicely. I'm pretty sure that he is gay because we hooked up last night. We were both pretty drunk, so it might have just been the alcohol, but I hope that it wasn't. He wears make-up sometimes, that must mean something. It was so amazing, the night I got my first kiss--all the fantasies becomming reality. We were hanging out by the woods with some other kids drinkng, and Nick told me to come with him into the darkness. So I did. We started getting pretty hot and heavy right away. Already to third base in a matter of minutes. But it all felt so right, so natural, so wonderful. My heart was beating like 100 miles per hour. I felt as though I was one with him. One of our friends, Kurt, walked by us, and was like, "What the fuck?" when he saw us. But we didn't care, we were in our own little world. He is amazing, and I hope that we never lose each other. I have this feeling on the inside that what we've started is something special.